


conditional fixation

by stearofoam



Category: Mission: Impossible (Movies)
Genre: Banter, Body Worship, Established Relationship, M/M, Not A Serious Discussion About Kinks and What-elses, Sentimental Middle Aged Agents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-08-12
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:40:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25868332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stearofoam/pseuds/stearofoam
Summary: "Not my fault you're ticklish.""Not your-- Okay fool me once, shame on you, tickle me more than twice, that's deliberate! You deliberately live to see me in agony!! - Benji cries out.(or, it's not a kink if there's a legit emotional reason to back it up.)
Relationships: Benji Dunn/Ethan Hunt
Comments: 16
Kudos: 51
Collections: Benthan Week 2020





	conditional fixation

**Author's Note:**

> A much shorter fic for Day 3 of Benthan Week 2020! I love, love, l-o-v-e the theme of this day, because I can't stop laughing whenever I read it :)))

How does one break it to their acquaintance slash trusted teammate slash boyfriend for 2 years that they have a bit of a conditional fixation on one's stomach?

That's Ethan's safe zone, 'conditional fixation'. He's not blind to the sexual aspect of life, and he knows enough to use the correct terminology for his kinks and desires -- and he doesn't have a belly kink. Confirmed, none. Not even with Julia, nor with Nyah, or even while he was still fantasizing about Claire.

But with Benji, he can't stop touching his pecs and stomach... for some reason.

And what is the reason, he wonders. Ethan has seen Benji shirtless before. Way before they begin a consummate relationship, from when Benji was still this baby-faced technician who was too wide-eyed about this grisly agency business and had a bit of fat on his belly. He remembers the first time he has seen Benji taking his shirt off: They got caught in a downpour in Jakarta, and Benji was grazed with a stray bullet from the assassins chasing them down from Tunjungan Plaza. It was up to Ethan to cut Benji's shirt off, disinfected and stitched his wounds, and it was nothing eye-catching for Ethan at that moment; in his eyes, Benji had been the inexperience junior whose body was still too soft, too lacking, too normal to be an agent who would be willing to pry a bullet out of his own abdomen in a dingy alley in Paris if that meant he would have another chance to live, to complete his mission.

Yet, Benji grows on him. Makes him see Benji in another light. Makes him change.

Ethan repeats in his mind -- _I do not have a belly kink._ But he's already standing up from his bed, making a beeline to the open bathroom, knowing Benji would take notice of his action by now.

"Ethan," - Benji warms as he sees Ethan's reflection in the mirror. His tuxedo bow is barely made and his shirt barely buttoned, teasing Ethan's eyes with peach skin, perk chest, and subtle abs. 

"Benji," - Ethan answers and gives Benji's neck a wet kiss.

It's a shame that Benji has grown complacent with Ethan. He likes it when Benji was still looking up to him, being all self-conscious and awe-struck when he did things like this; but that doesn't mean he doesn't like Benji now - no, he loves him even more - when Benji pretends to be annoyed at how Ethan is sneaking his hands past the hem of his shirt, playing with a nipple and ghosting his fingertips on Benji's stomach.

"If you tickle me right now, I'm ditching the glasses."

"Nooo, not the glasses!" - Ethan whines, but his hand stays in the same path - "You look great in those. Giving you that communication model was the best decision I've had that night."

"Then be a good boy and remove your hands, Ethan. Turandot starts in three hours." - Benji mumbles, swatting the hand playing with his chest away - "The opera revisit is your idea, remember?"

"Three hours is a long waiting time."

"You got us economic tickets with no pre-picked seats for _security reasons_. You do know how the good seats would run out in the first hour, right?"

Ethan hums nonchalantly. Then, he trails a path down to Benji's belly button, grinning as he sees Benji's skin breaks into goosebumps.

"That's it, no glasses on the date!"

Their wrestling match is made lightly since they're both mindful of their tuxes. It's basically just Ethan goes in for a hug, his arms are wrapping Benji's naked chest as they both whines like idiots, one begging the other to not deprive them of their few pleasures, and one bitching about how unfair the other is being right now.

"'S not my fault you're ticklish." - Ethan pouts, and he doesn't like to pout, because he actually prides himself in being mature and put together, most of the time. But desperate times, desperate measures.

"Not your-- Okay fool me once, shame on you, tickle me more than twice, that's deliberate! You deliberately live to see me in agony!" - Benji cries out.

It gets Ethan laughing, but he knows the cue to let Benji go. His hair is a bit mussed up, and his dress shirt is definitely wrinkled now. At least Benji takes his teasing in good nature, as he sighs his annoyance out and leans back to the bathroom sink, levels Ethan with a look of curiosity.

"Really, what's your deal with my stomach, Ethan? It's not just to make me howl like a banshee, as far as I can tell with you."

_You have a charming laugh, don't put yourself down like that_. "I thought we need to be quick since the opera will start in three hours." - Ethan says instead.

"Well, we're just talking, right? I just-- want to know you better, Ethan."

Benji shrugs, as if he doesn't understand the magnitude of the sentence, the impact it leaves on Ethan. _Want to know you better_ , he said, as if they haven't had more history together than with anyone else in the same circumstance, even before they admit their love to each other, even before they make the conscious announcement to stay alive for one another. Aside from Luther and Julia, Benji is the one that knows him best.

And Ethan - he believes - knows Benji best, too

"C'mere," - Ethan rasps out, his hand is already outstretched to welcome Benji into his arms. Benji melts into his hand like it's the most natural thing to do, letting Ethan cards his fingers into his hair as Ethan tugs him down for a sweet kiss, just lips gliding across each other to feel the contact, the warmth of another. He swipes his thumb down to Benji's button ear, then to his jaw, eggs him on opening his mouth for Ethan to brush his tongue against Benji's. He always loves the vibrato in Benji's throat when they kiss, like he can't keep himself quiet enough when being around Ethan, and maybe Benji has been like that to Ethan all the time. Ethan always regrets the time they have lost, the chance they should have taken, for they could have been happy with each other much sooner.

Benji is visibly confused as Ethan drags his kiss lower, from his jaw to a pulse on his neck, from his Adam's apple to his collarbones. "Ethan..." - he sounds so out of breath, the hitch in his voice goes straight to Ethan's cock - "We really-- I don't wanna miss Turandot a second time..."

"I know, sweetheart."

His lips travel to Benji's chest, tongues on a faint scar on his left chest. Benji is holding onto his nape, the grip goes unsure when to push or pull.

"You want an answer, right? I'm giving it." - He says, right above Benji's heart. He can feel his chuckles travel through, feels the vibrato on his own lips.

"For your, uh, fixations."

"It's not a kink, Benji."

"Okay, not a kink, not at _all--_ " - He makes a soft keen in his throat as Ethan sucks a hickey on his right chest, Ethan's hands are delicately cupping his waist - "Oh-- Okay, sorry, but I'm a bit lost to where this answer's supposed to go."

He places his last kiss on the top of Benji's abs, uses his hands to touch the scars on Benji's stomach instead. Ethan nests his face between Benji's chest for a while, hands absently running across his lover's skin while enjoying the soft gasps and sighs from him. Benji's body is more toned, abs more defined and muscle compacts into shape, his image now looks a distant relative than the Benji he had known years ago. However, this-- this new image, this new physique, although it really is an eye-candy, it's also a testament to the time and the hardship Benji has to overcome. Being a field technician means having a safer vantage point than your average field agent, but Benji does have his fair share of stab wounds, burn scars, bullet grazes, as well as many close chances with death.

Benj's body, to Ethan, is a testament to change. To both the bad, and the good changes. As Benji's eyes gain a new edge, much more hardened, his kindness, courage, and love for Ethan, always stay the same.

"You've gone through a lot. You've known the risk." - Ethan murmurs into Benji's skin - "And yet you stay. For me."

He props his chin onto Benji's chest, the pose and angle are all awkward as Benji is leaning back to a sink, while Ethan plasters himself onto his naked torso. Yet none of this matters, not even the growing ache in Ethan's back, because Benji is looking back at him with a mushy look, the right corner of his mouth is wavering as if all of this is overwhelming for Benji. And it's-- it is, for Ethan as well. It doesn't stop him, though.

He tips his toes up to kiss Benji again, this time letting Benji carding his fingers into his gelled-up hair, their kiss grows sloppy seconds after seconds. He smells Benji's aftershave, the Black Orchid he bought for him on his 48th birthday, the scent of mandarin and sandalwood deepen the taste as Ethan's tongue glides across the roof of Benji's mouth, to chase that lingering taste of jasmine tea and sweet scones.

As they let go of each other, Benji's blue eyes are dazed, sultry, and-- well, this is where Ethan is to blame.

"Also, that time you came untouched when I--"

"Okay, out, you menace." - He shoos Ethan right away - "Out of the bathroom, go on!"

Ethan keeps on laughing as he gets his butt kicked (literally!), only gets to see Benji's flushed face for a second or so. He goes to re-gell his hair again, fixing his slightly disheveled attire by the standing mirror. He likes this hotel, its room has all the updated necessity and stylish decor fitting with his aesthetic. Maybe when they have more time, maybe when they have another break from the job like this, they can stay here for a couple more days. And maybe, just maybe, Ethan can guide Benji through the streets of Vienna, free from danger, and hold his hands as they traverse through the Lichtenstein Museum. Like a regular couple.

Benji emerges from the bathroom ten minutes later, looking as breath-taking and speech-robbing as the first time he saw Benji in Vienna. And he knows that Benji has a soft spot for him because the black-rimmed glasses are on Benji's face, per requested before they arrived at the hotel.

Benji greets him with a kiss on the cheek. Then, before Ethan can act, he crans his neck and purr into his right ear:

"I don't know what are you planning, but if it's to set me up into fucking you _senseless_ tonight, _you've done it_."

Ethan's breath stutters, out of balance, meanwhile Benji walks to the door and opens it for both of them as if nothing happened.

Oh. Okay.

If Benji sees a skip in Ethan's pace, then he's done well not to mention the obvious.


End file.
